Wither
by Davey Dorko
Summary: Fic profile pic done by my good friend Raven. She can be found on deviant art- cactuarZrule. The Femshep in the pic is my own version. I gave her the same tattoos I have. It's unique! Huzzah! She will gladly do the same for you, if you would like your pairing drawn.
1. Chapter 1

So...after many years, it has come down to this...my friend on this site has gotten me to post a fic. (You know who you are) and here it is. Be gentle. First time posting. Thanks for being supportive. I own nothing.

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Zaeed was a man who never saw himself caring much for others. On a team, as far as he knew it was every man for himself. Didn't matter who was wounded or dead. Casualties happen and that just meant more bounty in the end for him. That didn't mean he killed them for fun. No man was killed without reason. Outright. Maybe if they didn't say 'excuse me' when they got in his way. Or 'bless you' when he sneezed. Legitimate reasons only.

He found out quickly that his lack of "teamwork" was not appreciated on the Normandy. They made the Chambers girl come down from the CIC to put it nicely to him. She talked to him like he was a grade schooler. With her smile and hyper active hand movements. No one could be that goddamn happy all the time. It wasn't healthy. Whatever meds she was on maybe she should share them with that Jack bitch. Nevertheless, he became a team player. Even though he was being paid to kill, not make friends. If he had known he'd have to put up with so many goddamn regs and people he'd have demanded more credits from the Illusive Man.

Then there were the rounds that Shepard did. Same order and routine after every mission. That part wasn't as bad as it sounded. The woman actually listened to you. She came down to get to know ya. She actually listened to his stories and asked detailed questions. She made you feel like a 'part of the team.' She didn't go down to the compactor to give orders or yell at him for sticking a hand painted handicap sign on jokers chair, or yell at him for telling Grunt that human females liked being called cunts.

Good kid she was. She ran it tight on the field. But on the ship, everyone was on their own. As long as they didn't do much damage, mind you. One time he was on his way to the armory for some more gun oil and he actually heard Shepard tell that Chambers girl to "Shut your trap and stop snitching." Good laugh he had with that one. The look on that poor girl's face was too goddamn priceless.

He knew Shepard tried her best in everything she did but she wasn't much like the Alliance made her out to be. She wasn't the poster paragon they portrayed. He's seen her kill when she had every opportunity not to. Hell even HE could have talked that Mordin Solus out of shooting his old friend. He's seen her bet on a varren fight, punch a reporter and even deal packages to salarians on omega. She wasn't all like everyone had said she was. Besides her renegade streaks, seeing her day to day off the field he could tell she was laid back and actually had time for a laugh.

A few times she threw knives with him at a picture of Miranda they printed out from her file. Cerberus bitch, they called her. Never knew when to leave well enough alone. "There's no smoking allowed aboard this vessel, Mr. Massani." She'd always say. It was like she had a goddamm sense of whenever he lit up.

"Commander Shepard has returned. XO Lawson has been relieved." The damn AI always had to announce. One time he thought he heard her say "Mr. Massani has exited the men's room." She always had to let you know when she was there. Couldn't blend with organics very well, no matter how hard she tried. Good thing he snubbed all the bugs he found on his side of the ship. Felt bad for the poor brittle bone kid up front who had to sit next to the damn thing.

He knew that it was only a matter of time till Shepard came through to his side of the cargo hold. He liked to pinpoint exactly when she would walk through.

"5. 4. 3. 2. 1." He said to himself. Shepard had walked in as he finished. She gave him a look as he chuckled to himself.

"What?" She said as she looked down at herself to check if her fly was down.

"You're on time as usual. Just did the countdown as you walked in. So predictable." He said with a smirk.

She gave a sly smile. "One of these times I'm going to trip you up. Change the Times. Maybe even send Miranda in my place."

He threw his hands up in defense "Hey, hey, you win. That's a threat this old merc can't handle. That bitch thinks she's the Aria of the ship. One time she told me to clean my room."

Shepard snorted "Well, she got the Bitch part down right to the T. So, we can talk shit about her later. I have found something amazing! I think you're gonna love it. No, I know you're gonna love it. You better love it."

"Show me already! Your rambling woman!" He snapped.

She held out an old bottle of Sailor Jerry's that was covered in dirt and grime. It was obviously from earth but she found it on her last mission helping Jack blow up some goddamn lab. It had to have been decades old. She wore a big cheesy smile as his jaw dropped.

"Well, goddamn! I haven't seen one of them since I was actually on earth back in my first gang days! Whoever had that bottle had a fine taste and lots of creds." He said with excitement as he took the bottle from her and examined it.

"Wait, wait there's more! Garrus said I was being a perv and you were a bad influence...but I told him to shove it and kiss my arse." She said as she held out a small white cardboard box for him to take.

He put the bottle down on a footlocker nearby and took the box. He moved over to Jessie's table and shoved some things aside. He opened the box and let out a long low whistle. He turned around and unfolded a magazine sideways. It was an old playboy magazine. There was a stack of them in the box. Looked like a collection.

"Shepard, you're a woman after my own heart. You were right...I love it. And that isn't even in my vocabulary!" He laughed.

She walked over to the desk and opened a footlocker she knew the glasses were in. Grabbing two shot glasses she walked over with the bottle and sat on a locker.

"How about we drink and enjoy some damn fine earth art?" She smiled and held the bottle for him to open.

The doors to the starboard cargo opened. As they both turned to see who it was as Miranda walked in with her over exaggerated hip sway. She paused and posed with one hip sticking out and she flung her hair unnecessarily over her shoulder. She threw up an eyebrow as she looked at them in mid bottle pass.

"Enjoying yourself Shepard?" She said sarcastically.

Shepard gave a long inhale and sighed out heavily as she hung her head "I WAS about too. What do you need Miranda? Wait, before you answer-does it have to be done now? Is anyone dying? And do you have to post like that? I mean, really, no one's taking pictures." Zaeed let out a bark like laugh. He never hid the fact that he disliked someone.

"The Illusive Man is waiting on vid comm in the-" "I know where it is." "It's regarding Alenko. And I DO NOT pose." She said as a matter of fact and walked out of the room but not before flipping her hair again.

"You think she saw the picture of her on the wall?" Zaeed asked.

"Probably not. She was too focused on making an entrance. Ugh I'll be back. Don't drink that without me!" Shepard said as she groaned and walked to the door.

"I'll let you go. Talk more later, Shepard." He said. It was his usual goodbye.

Close to an hour later Shepard came back with a serious look on her face that made him pause his knife cleaning. He knew that face. It was her "Shit's going down" face.

"I'm sorry; we have to postpone our party. But I just got word that a colony went silent. Got reason to believe it's the collectors. Alenko is there. We're headed there now and I will be needing some big guns. We've got 40 minutes till we hit the relay. Are you up for some revenge? I came down here so you could get first dibs." She said with a fire in her eyes he hadn't seen before.

"Oh I've got your big guns right here, Shepard. You know me, always ready for a good fight." He smirked and followed her out to the armory.

When they got there he was getting their guns locked and loaded as Shepard suited up and Garrus packed spare clips in his armor since he was all ready to go. Zaeed was rarely ever out of armor unless he was showering or in a confined locked room, so of course he was always first ready aside from Garrus.

Joker's voice came over the comm "Approaching the relay now Commander."

"Alright, so here's the deal, this is a rescue mission. Keep the casualties to a minimum. No games. Figure out what's going on. Save the colonists. Find Alenko. Shoot anything that looks Geth, Husk or Collector like. You know what, just shoot anything that isn't supposed to be there." She said as she took her guns from Zaeed and ammo clips from Garrus.

"On your six Shepard." Garrus confirmed.

"Lead the way." Zaeed replied.


	2. Chapter 2

OK...one review from my awesome friend! Staying positive here. *Forced smile* Yet again, I own nothing. Some dialog was taken from a very good song I love. Brownie points to those who know what song it is. This chapter I vented everything I ever wanted to say to Kaidan. *shifty eyes*

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"Commander Shepard. Captain of the Normandy. The first human Spectre. Savior of the Citadel." a voice said from behind them.

They all turned around quickly to see a man in black armor with only the front of his hair gelled up that made it look like some sort of ramp. Garrus growled next to Zaeed. He didn't know what the big deal was, until he saw the look on Shepard's face.

"I thought you were dead, Shepard. We all did." the man said as he pulled her into a tight embrace. Garrus growled again and tightened his hold on his rifle. Zaeed got it now, he was an old lover and Blue was getting jealous.

Shepard didn't wrap her arms around him in return. She just stood there stiffly. Her face looked uncertain and awkward.

"Cerberus brought me back to stop attacks like this." she said as she pried herself away from his death grip and stepped back to a more comfortable distance towards Garrus and Zaeed.

"I thought we had something, Shepard. Something real. I... I loved you." he said.

Zaeed leaned over to Garrus and grunted "100 creds says he cries." But Garrus ignored him.

"I don't know what you're talking about. This is neither the time, nor the place to talk about this." Shepard said as she turned her back to walk away but he opened his mouth again.

"I moved on. At least, I thought I did. But now we've got reports about you and Cerberus." He said while taking a step forward.

"Reports? You mean you already knew?" Garrus butted in with an angry tone.

"Alliance Intel thought that Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonies. They got a tip this colony might be the next one to get hit. Anderson stonewalled me, but there were rumors that you weren't dead. That you were working for the enemy." Kaidan explained.

"I don't have to explain myself to you. But you can tell ANDERSON that Cerberus and I want the same thing: to save our colonies. That doesn't mean I answer to them. Besides, what makes you think I haven't moved on? You were always so self-centered." she replied as she turned and pointed a finger at him.

"Do you really believe that? Or is that just what Cerberus wants you to think? I wanted to believe the rumors that you were alive, but never expected anything like this! You turned your back on everything we believed in. You betrayed the Alliance. You betrayed me." Kaidan replied. It was his turn to point fingers.

"Betrayal? Who ignored the Reaper threat? Who denied the collectors? Who left my body for scavengers?" she snapped.

"This isn't you Shepard. You need to come back to the Alliance. Come back to me. Where you belong. I want to believe you, Shepard. But I don't trust Cerberus. They could be using the threat of a Reaper to manipulate you." He grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her.

"Damn it, Kaidan! You're so focused on Cerberus that you're ignoring the real threat!" Garrus yelled as he pushed Kaidan roughly on the shoulder to get him off of her.

"I'm tired of everyone telling me what I should and shouldn't do. Then leaving me with all the blame. I died so everyone could finish what I started. I come back and the galaxy is in pieces! I want you, the Alliance and the Council to back off and go back to believing I'm dead. Listen Kaidan, and you better understand every word. You were always casting your shadow on me. But now I'm casting mine on you. Your best chances are left with nothing. I'M turning my back on you. You never looked in to who I could be, you only knew me for who I was. Remember I told you where I was going? I'll explain it now. I want you to see me, living the life that you'll never have. I want you to see me, laugh at the emptiness in your hand." She said with fire in her eyes that Zaeed had never seen.

There was an awkward silence in the air. Zaeed let out a deep laugh he couldn't hold in. Everyone turned and looked at him in surprise. Kaidan's face was priceless to him. Garrus may or may not have heard him, but he just lost 100 credits. Harsh words he was glad weren't directed towards him. Garrus moved closer to Shepard and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Goodbye, Shepard. And be careful out there." Kaidan said as silent tears went down his face.

"You'll never fall asleep, knowing I'm in your dreams." she smirked and nodded to Garrus and Zaeed that it was time to get to the EVAC zone.

They rode back to the ship in silence. Garrus looked worried as he watched Shepard sit with her elbows on her knees and her face in her hands. Zaeed just tried minding his own damn business by cleaning his gun and trying to ignore Garrus' sad Turian noises. He didn't get involved in people's personal business. That meant getting attached. People always had a tendency of double crossing him, or dying, or leaving him. He was just fine alone.

When they got to the Normandy, Shepard was the last one out. Zaeed started making himself busy by unloading the salvaged parts and goods they found. Garrus tried talking to Shepard but she just held a hand up to silence him and walked to the elevator.

In passing she said "Good work."

Zaeed replied "Still got that bottle for when you're ready." She nodded and walked out of the hangar.

"Can you believe that kid? I can't believe he called HER a traitor! I should have hit him. I should have...helped her." Garrus finished with a low tone Zaeed barely heard.

"I think she handled herself pretty damn well. Look mate, whatever went on between them in the past was just finalized today. And she needs to sort it out. On her own. She knows how important the mission is. If she wants to talk to you, she'll find you." He said as he kept unloading.

"Thanks." Garrus replied.

"All right, Blue. That's about the only advice I can give you on women. Other than don't bother with them. Now get out of here and go play with your precious cannons. Im tired of looking at your mug." He said as he returned to unloading.

Garrus left him to finish up.


	3. Chapter 3

So, views are going up. *insert cheesy smile here* Big thanks again to my friend, Carleen! Go look at her awesome stories, she's a big inspiration. She was also the first one to review! *clapping* Some other reviews might be nice. Would give me a sense of direction. *hint hint* Anyway, here are some drunken shenanigans. I own nothing.

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The next cycle day he spent cleaning his armor. He was that goddamn bored and was damn sure that Shepard wasn't going to be making her rounds today, due to what happened yesterday on horizon. He sat on a footlocker having already finished the pieces of his arm and had started working on his chest piece trying to remove the blood, and black muck that husks spewed when they 'sploded. Getting them out of the crevices they always seemed to find was difficult. He sat in silence and in his lower armor half and a black muscle shirt thinking about what happened on horizon and why Shepard and Garrus were all hot and bothered.

It was obviously about that Alenko kid. How bad did he hurt her? Was she that bent over some dick with a stupid hair cut? Why did he care?

He paused in mid thought and sat up straight. Why did he care? She was his Commander, nothing more. His participation was bought, not earned or sought out. By a third party he might add. Sure, he enjoyed her company. The way she would get his sick jokes, throw knives, drink like a Krogan and playfully flirt with him knowing it was harmless and just to pass the time. Harmless right? He knew it was just being sociable. Right?

He just denied any sort of friendship with her to keep himself from caring yet, listed off everything he found positive in her. Were they friends? Should he ask her? Do normal people do that?

He was angry at himself for becoming friends with her, and angry for not knowing sooner, yet disappointed in himself for not being a better friend. "This is bloody bullshit. Making friends is fucking complicated as fuck." he said as he continued to clean his armor in silence while arguing with himself.

A few hours later, his door opened and out reflex he quickly grabbed his shotgun beside his leg and aimed it at the intruder. After recognizing who it was he lowered it quickly and set it down.

"Whoa buddy, If I had known a half-naked man would be waiting for me on the other side of that door I would have worn something a little classier." she joked as she walked further into the room to sit on her usual foot locker across from him.

"Old habits die hard, besides I figured you wouldn't be comin' down today. Due to that jack off yesterday." he said as he kept cleaning. He looked up to catch her staring at his lack of armor. Her cheeks turned pink and she looked away quickly. He smirked at her embarrassment of getting caught. She may be a soldier, a commander and THE Shepard, but she was still a woman.

"Yeah, I'm over it. Besides, I have a job to do. No man, friendship, or stubborn galactic government could ever get in the way of that."

"Hmmm, ain't that the truth? What did you want to talk about today?" he said as he set aside the armor and rested his elbows on his knees.

"Anything! You're the last of my rounds and I've got nowhere to be. Besides, I'm hiding from Garrus. He's a damn good friend but I do not need to be babied right now." she sighed as she stretched her back side to side.

"Well, what do you need right now?" he surprised even himself. Did he just say that? That's what friends do right?

She looked at him and gave him a big cheesy smile. "A drink! You didn't finish our bottle did you? Oh, here it is!" She got up and grabbed it off of the table where Jessie was laying. He made his way over to the desk and grabbed two shot glasses out of a cabinet.

"Do the honors, Mr. Massani." she held the bottle out to him.

He thudded over and opened the bottle carefully. He took a long deep inhale from the bottle. "Now this is some damn good rum. Not like that Batarian shit they sell in clubs. Uncut my arse! 'Ere, go on, take a whiff."

"Wooooooo! Burns the nose. If it smells like it's going to hurt then you know it's going to be a good time." She said with a matter of fact tone.

"You're not bad Shepard, not bad." He said as he poured the shots.

"To being big goddamn heroes." They said as they downed their shots.

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A few hours later after they had killed the bottle and moved on to his private stock, they were still sitting on the lockers looking at the magazines she had brought him and telling stories.

"See, look at this broad. You don't find 'em like that anymore. Now a days you got all these fake bitches with perfect teeth, fake breasts, and no arse! See this one, got them hips to hang on to. Ones like Cerberus Bitch up there ain't got no spark! You can see it in 'er eyes! This is a magazine and you can tell she's a feisty one." He said as he held out the picture.

"Look at this one. First one I've seen with tattoos. Not bad. She should have paid more the get better shading done." She held out the picture.

He grunted in response "Nothin' better than a broad who likes pain. Don't find many of those anymore either. They're either Asari, or Alliance dykes."

"Heeey! Watch it buddy!" She said with a hiccup. The alcohol had obviously kicked in.

"What? Does the big poster child for freedom actually have some ink?" He said as he waved his arms around in a drunken manner to express his statement.

"Some ink? I've got more ink that you, buddy!" She said as she pointed a finger at him and stood up to remove her jacket and shirt to get to her muscle shirt.

"Now this I've got to see! Ba dum dum da ba dum dum da!" He said trying to mimic a beat he heard in a club once. It sounded nothing like it.

She laughed and almost fell as her shirt came off. She was right. She was covered. He didn't know why he'd never see it before. Then again she always wore that damn N7 hoodie or her armor.

He whistled again "Damn girly. You got quite a bit of ink. Idunno about having MORE than me though. I've got more than sleeves done here." He said challenging her.

"As do I. Show me yours, I show you mine. I shouldn't be the only one showing off here. I've got my back, chest, ribs and legs done. Lost count after a while." She said as she turned around to life her shirt a bit and show her back.

He chuckled and stood up as he downed another shot and handed one to her. He started untucking his muscle shirt. She took her shot and stood there with a look of 'well, I'm waiting' when his door opened.

"Shepard, EDI told me you were down here-" Garrus said as he walked in to the smell of alcohol, smoke and the sight of his best friend half naked and his least favorite person on board was in the process of doing so.

"Heeey Garrus, you want in on this bet? Turian's have more to show that what's above that armor right? You can be the judge! Zaeed, what are we betting on? We didn't even pick." She rambled with a giggle.

"We didn't? Damn. How about a steak? A nice big juicy pink center steak that's big enough for Grunt to choke on." He said as used his hands for size reference.

"Yeeeeah! Garbus you want to bet on a...fish steak...or whatever it is you guys eat?" She said as she swayed over to him almost stumbling.

"Shepard, I think you've had enough. You have a big day tomorrow. We have to meet with Anderson tomorrow on the citadel to fix your Spectre status, remember?" Garrus said as he caught her falling into him.

"I love that guy! Hey, Zaeed! Pour one for a toast to Anderson." She turned around too fast and almost fell again but Garrus caught her and pulled her to him. She had her back to his torso and she was leaning funny.

"It's time for bed Shepard. You can finish your bet-whatever the hell it is-when you're sober." He said sternly and started guiding her out while giving Zaeed a dirty look.

She looked over her shoulder and said "Apparently even big goddamn heroes have bed times too. This isn't over Massani! Your ass is mine!"

"You'd like that wouldn't you, kinky Bitch!" He yelled back as his doors closed. He stumbled over to his cot and passed out with an arm and a leg hanging off the side.


	4. Chapter 4

So thanks to Carleen again! This is a rush post. I won't have time to write anything for awhile since I've got a carburetor to rebuild! Loving the stat numbers. Would love more reviews! I own nothing. K thanks bye!

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The next cycle morning Shepard was woken up to Joker's voice.

"Rise and shine Commander! 2 hours till we hit the citadel. That gives you enough time to shower, brush your teeth, have Gardner make you a meal of champions-" he started.

"JOKER!" was all she said. As she heard a chuckle and the comm sound ending their conversation. She rolled out of bed and headed to the shower.

"EDI, tell Garrus and Zaeed to meet me at the airlock 15 minutes before docking." She said as she went into the bathroom.

"Yes Commander, logging you out."

She turned on the shower and washed away her sins from the night before.

"Commander, I'm not getting a response from Mr. Massani. Should I ask XO Lawson to check on him?" EDI said a few minutes later.

Shepard sighed, "No, I'll get him. He's probably passed out drunk still. Kept the party going after I left most likely."

She towelled off and started her process of getting ready. She did a quick parting of her hair and brushed her fingers through it with some mousse. She always like the messy look, she'd never admit if though. Her excuse would always be that she never cared or was too busy. NO, she liked going for the opposite of paragon look. She had a new found freedom with no Alliance regulations.

"Look at me, breaking regs! My hair is past my my collar, quick, someone write me up!" she said to herself in a sarcastic manner. She had a habit of talking to herself and she was pretty sure she picked it up from Zaeed. EDI had to learn that not everything was meant to have an answer or reply. Shepard made her understand that unless she said her name directly, she was not to answer, butt in, reply or talk at all.

She noticed that her eyes were a brighter shade of red that when Cerberus first woke her up. Cybernetics they said. Chakwas informed her that they would flare with more negativity in her daily routines. Renegade actions counted as well, no matter how much fun they were. She had Chakwas take care of the scars on her face but there was nothing she could do for her eyes. Apparently the saying was right, eyes are the windows to the soul. And her's was no saint. It didnt bother her much since it helped her look a bit more dangerous than she already was. Comes into play during interrogations, shakedowns and getting better prices on those plastic ships she likes!

She was going to keep the scars in the beginning. They made her who she was now and before. She had a long talk to Zaeed about what he would do. Personally he would never change his scars. He was too proud of them, helped with the ladies and reminded him of his goal. That was the gist of what he told her. It was Garrus' opinion that made her change it.

'It would never bother any of us Shepard, but when trying to talk to the Council or the Alliance about not being with Cerberus or the collectors, it really wouldnt help your case. It's hard enough as it is getting people to believe you.' he was right.

As much as she hated the Alliance and the Council, she needed them. Hell, they needed her. So she went through with the operation and was actually surprised at how good it turned out. Her skin was never that soft before due to all the years of dirt and sweat that it was always covered in. The good doctor also seemed to think that some permanent eyeliner would do the Commander some good. She didnt like that the doctor did it without consulting her, but damn, it brought out her eyes.

"Watch out Miranda, you've got competition now!" she cracked herself up sometimes. She never saw herself as attractive. She surprised herself by getting pretty boy Kaidan back on the first Normandy. Nope, she wasn't going to dwell on that anymore.

She was dressed in her another black muscle shirt and was wearing some black BDU pants. She had left her favorite N7 hoodie in Zaeed's room when Garrus had literally dragged her out of there. She started lacing up her boots trying to recall last night's events.

She remembered naked women and a guy named Jerry. That didnt sound right. She remembered smoking one of Zaeed's cigars, which would explain why her throat was sore. Then Miranda came down to scold Zaeed about his smoking. She defended him by saying "I don't see a 'no smoking' sign, Lawson." Then there was a knife throwing contest, a few games of Earth poker and too many rounds of "Fuck, Marry, Kill". They ended up killing everyone.

They started talking about tattoos, showing off, betting on choking Grunt. That didnt sound right either. Garrus showed up and tried to cover her lack of clothing with his body. She was still wearing a muscle shirt and her BDU pants. She didnt know why he was bothered by it. Maybe he wasnt used to seeing someone who lacked clothing that wasnt and Asari dancer. She should apologize and explain.

That Turian was weird like that sometimes. Stepping up for her when it wasn't needed, standing too close, putting his hand on her shoulder. He hadn't been that way on the first normandy. Sure, he still followed her around like a lost puppy but he wasn't as bad as before. Maybe he was over protective since she already died once. Acting he big brother part? He was her best friend after all. He was always to call first dibs on missions so he was out on the field with her every damn time.

She didnt make people go out if they didnt want to. If their game wasn't 100% that day then she didnt want to make then go. It's like he had a weird sense of when she was leaving the ship. No one else minded that they wouldn't get a chance to go. Seems like if they had an option to not get shot at that day, they took it. Weird.

She made her way to Zaeed's rooms and met Garrus in the elevator on the 3rd floor. He was going to the cockpit to kill time till they docked. He had to take the ride down to drop her off on her floor and go back up. During the ride she took the opportunity to explain last night.

"Hey buddy, thanks for taking care of me last night. I could have made it alright without you though."she said.

"You called me 'Garbus', couldn't stand without me holding you and tried to get me to get naked with both of you. Something about 'Turian's have more to show under that armor.'" he said with a smooth low tone, a Turian smirk where his mandibles twitched and looked down at her with those blue eyes. That face, always that face! Whenever she was wrong or when he wanted to prove a point. Damn him.

"Ok, ok, ok! I could have at least crashed there! The naked thing can be explained-"she always rambled when she was in trouble or got caught doing something wrong.

He cut her off and leaned down to her eye level their noses were inches apart and he had that damn smirk "Shepard, I have no issues with showing YOU what's under this armor. But I do not enjoy showing other men. This Turian doesn't go that way and THIS Turian doesn't share. Besides, I DO NOT like the idea of leaving you scantily clad, drunk and passed out within the reach of a Merc."

She stood ther with her mouth open and her eyes wide. The door to the elevator opened and she took her chance and mumbled something about meeting at the airlock and quickly jumped out. He was still smirking when she left.

What the hell just happened? Did he make a pass at her or was he being his normal sarcastic self? Maybe he was hanging out with Joker too much. Yeah, that's it. She shrugged it off and walked down the hall way to Zaeed's room.

Once inside she paused and looked for him. She found him passed out half off his cot with parts of his armor still missing from last nights bet. She walked over and and shook his arm.

"Pick someone else." he groaned and turned over trying to avoid her.

"Come on, Massani. We got shit to do. And today is gonna be a good day. Because we get to go annoy the shit out of the Council." She said as she shook him again.

"Alright! Alright! Goddamn it. I'm up. Where's my bottle?" He said as he rolled back over and tried feeling around the make shift shelf a foot locker served for his alcohol.

She snagged it and got up. "Oh no you don't. Work first, then we can get back to me beating you. What the hell were we betting on? I remember the tattoos, but something about choking Grunt. It doesn't make sense." She said as she got up to find her jacket.

"Ugh...you're a heartless bitch. I don't remember anything 'bout choking Grunt, but a drunken bet is still a bet and we're got a Krogan to choke." He said as he sat up and rubbed his neck.

"Last night I was a kinky bitch, now I'm heartless. Your words cut deep Massani!" she held her hand to her heart and laughed.

He started to put her armor back on. "Oh no no no. Your not going out like that. Shower first. You have time. You smell like Omega's back alley." She said as she pushed him towards the door to the elevator.

"I take back what I said, YOU'RE the Aria of the ship. Alright, alright! I'll shower." he yelled as he let her push him to the elevator.

In the elevator he took the opportunity to asked her what else happened while he was rubbing his eyes and stretching. She was going to put her hoodie on but it smelled like he looked. She'd have Chambers wash it. That girl was happy to do anything for her.

"So I remember Blue coming down to steal you from me. What happened with that?" he asked before he went into a large yawn.

"About that...Garrus thinks we were trying to get him naked and into a threesome. Because we were half naked and trying to get him to show us his tattoos."she said as he rubber her forehead.

The elevator was filled with his deep laughter as they rode to the 3rd floor to drop him off. By the time they reached his floor he was holding his sides and gasping for air.

"I'm glad you had a good laugh Massani. Meet you at the air lock." she said as the doors closed behind him and he walked out still chuckling.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry for the lack of posting. I was having a hectic week for double Ford classes. Anyway, took me awhile. Hope everyone enjoys this chapter. It's my Fav so far. Made myself laugh. I want to thank Carleen again! Everyone should go look at her work and see how a pro get's it done!

* * *

On their way through the Citadel processing doors they had realized that this wasn't the same Citadel they had left back when the Reaper and Saren attacked. Everything was big, shiny and hectic. Shepard didn't like any of it. She didn't like change and she didn't like being told that she had to get processed.

"I see the problem already, Commander Shepard. My console says you're dead." Bailey said.

"You're not worried I'm some imposter claiming to be me?" she said

"We have the best screening equipment in the galaxy. Those scanners can sample DNA from skin flakes. Hell, if you have unregistered gene mods, they can even figure those out." he explained.

"Your sergeant said you could help with that." She said.

"Usually you'd have to go through the Station Security Administration to reactivate your IDs. Then to Customs and Immigration to regain access to the Citadel itself. And probably a stop by the treasury. 'Spending a year dead' is a popular tax dodge. But, I can see you're a busy woman. So how about I just press this button right here, and we call it done?" he asked.

"Couldn't one of us or both of us get in trouble for that?" she said.

"Do you have to argue with everyone? Just get it over with already. The faster we get done the faster we get the hell out of here." Garrus leaned in and scolded her with his hand on her shoulder.

"Fine! Push that magical button that fixes my record then Bailey." She said with a nasty look to Garrus.

"Done. You're good to go. You should head up to the Presidium, though. The Council would probably like to know that one of their lost Specters' is still kicking." He said.

"I will. Having access to the Council and the Spectres' resources would be useful." She replied.

"Yeah, the Council can get anything. Best thing about working C-Sec is that any equipment, info or money you need, you get. Anyway. Something else you need? Or can I get back to work?" he said as he already turned back to his computer.

* * *

After they left Anderson's office it was clear that everyone was in a bad mood. Shepard's Spectre status had been reinstated but no further support had been granted. Then she found out Anderson went behind her back by stationing Kaidan on horizon. There was an awkward silence in the cab as they made their way back to the zakera ward. Garrus had made another awkward attempt to console her but she shrugged his hand off of her shoulder. He just didn't know when the right and wrong moments were. Poor Blue.

Zaeed was the first to break the awkward silence as usual "So, Blue, you know you still owe me 100 creds right?"

"I never agreed to that bet." Garrus shook his head.

"You never said no either. Silence is always to be taken as a yes. And that jackass with a stupid haircut cried like a bitch. Pay up." Zaeed teased.

"He's got a point Garrus, you never said no." she chimed in. Her mood had obviously started to perk up.

"I can't believe you're siding with this Merc! Fine, if I'm going to pay you, let me at least pay you in alcohol. I know we could all use a drink." Garrus gave her his big stupid smirk again.

"Hell yeah, Blue! You're not half bad after all."

"Woo! Garrus actually wants to have fun!" they said as they both slapped Garrus on the back and made their way to Dark Star.

* * *

When they walked in they made their way over to a booth in the back corner where it was quieter and darker than the rest of the club.

"What do you fleshy things drink? I don't want to sound like an idiot when I order something." Garrus asked as he remained standing as they slid in the booth.

"Harshest whiskey they got. And if it's over 100 creds tell them to put it on my tab." Zaeed said without a pause.

They both looked at him with a weird face. "Riiiiight, I'll be back." Garrus said as he turned and walked over to the bar to get their drinks.

"Geez Massani, come here often?" Shepard said with a smirk and rested her elbows on the table and looked around the bar.

"I'll have you know this is the prime place to have meetings with potential clients." He said as he took a look around as well. It was a habit for them. You don't make it this far in life as a merc or a Spectre without taking in your surroundings.

"Here, I hope I don't kill you Shepard." Garrus said as he laid the bottle and glasses on the table and took a seat next to her. She was now sitting between them.

"Oi, and what about me?" Zaeed said as he threw his hands up. Garrus grumbled and passed him a shot he poured for him.

"Do the honors Massani." He took the shot and held it up to both of them with pride written on his face. As the glass hovered by his lips he paused and his eyes changed from jest to serious. He set the glass down and slid it over to Shepard.

"You're gonna need this more than I am." He said as he laid his hand on his gun under the table.

"What are you-" she stared to say but immediately saw what he was focused on. Kaidan. She made a face and picked up the shot then slammed it back down on the table when she was done. She poured herself another intending to repeat the pattern.

"Oh…maybe he won't see us." Garrus said as he leaned out of the booth and craned his neck to get a better view.

"Oh yes Garrus, he'll never see three armed people in bright ass yellow, red and blue or a Turian sticking his neck out like a goddamn giraffe. STOP STARING!" she said as she tugged him back in the booth by the neck of his armor.

"What's a giraffe?"

"SHUT UP!" Shepard and Zaeed said at the same time in hushed voices.

"What should I do? There's only one way in and out of this place and he's standing in our way. Do I play it off like I don't know him? Garrus-" she was rambling again, like she always did when she was nervous. The meeting that happened on horizon would have had her acting in the same manner if her speech wasn't secretly rehearsed in her bathroom in front of a mirror.

Zaeed slammed his fist down on the table and looked at her "Goddamn it Shepard, you can't let that fucking kid get to you like that. Now, do you trust me?"

"Yes." "No." They said at the same time. She agreed quickly in hopes of him saving her. Garrus immediately shot him down.

They looked at each other in disbelief before he demanded their attention again. "Look, there's only one way to get rid of an old employer, fling or whatever you have. That's showing them you've moved on to bigger better things. Get what I'm saying?"

"What are you getting at?" Garrus said as he leaned in closer with a confused look on his face.

"Terminate the contract. I get it. Who's it going to be then?" She said as she poured another shot for herself and downed it.

"Who's what? What is the plan?" Garrus said a little too loud.

"Shh! You are the loudest Turian I have ever heard-did you just wave at him? You stupid big socially awkward bird! Now you can't be my fake boyfriend! He's walking over here, you go stall him!" she scolded as she pushed him out of the booth and he was forced to make a quick recover from an awkward stumble.

Garrus looked back at them only to see they were both shooing him with their hands and mouthing "Get out of here!" He was so confused but he did was he was told, stall Kaidan.

As they watched Garrus leave Zaeed grabbed her and pulled her to him and started unclasping her armor.

"What the fuck are you doing? I thought we were going to cuddle or something!" she whispered and tried to slap his hands away.

"Do I look like the goddamn cuddlin' type Shepard? How stupid would it look if two people in armor were trying to cuddle? Even you've had your laugh at affectionate Volus couples. It makes more sense if you lost it rather than me." He said as he threw her arm guards behind the booth where it was hidden by a fake Asari plant. She wasn't wearing her under suit. Just her usual BDU pants and her muscle shirt. She instinctively threw her arms around herself to cover her tattoos.

"But-" "You said you trusted me." He said as he threw her leg armor with the rest.

"But-" she tried to say again.

He grabbed her chin and made her look at him "You have to trust me; you have to make this believable."

"Ok. I trust you." She said and took off her own torso pieces.

He picked up the whiskey bottle and took six large gulps from it and passed it to her. As she was taking her own share from the bottle he peaked out from the booth quickly to assess the situation. Garrus was standing by the bar with their back to them talking to Kaidan with his hand on his shoulder. Kaidan was already standing up ready to head over.

Zaeed grabbed her by the waist and lifted her to sit on his lap sideways. She let out a little squeal and her cheeks turned bright red. He smirked and lifted her chin towards him and leaned in to kiss her roughly.

She was stiff at first but she closed her eyes and slowly started to kiss him back. She slowly slid her hands from his that were holding her waist and sliding them up his arms. When her hand reached the arm that was exposed with tattoos she paused and explored there. The other hand made its way to the back of his neck. He wasn't expecting the contact and it caused him to give a small grunt. She smirked and opened her eyes to see him give a raised eyebrow. Zaeed always liked a challenge; the situation was one in itself. But that smirk of hers was another he couldn't pass up. He slid one hand under her shirt to rub the small of her back. She gasped and he took a chance with the parting of her lips and pushed his tongue in to deepen the kiss. She looked at him again and it was his turn to smirk.

Game on.

She was pretty sure the alcohol had kicked in because she was enjoying it far too much. His smell, the closeness, his rough lips on hers. Yep, she was wasted, had to be.

This was by far his favorite mission that he had ever accepted. He couldn't remember the last time he had a pretty young thing in his lap that he hadn't paid for. All to make an old flame jealous? He didn't care if he got paid at this point.

They could tell Garrus and Kaidan were getting closer because of the Turian's unusually loud voice to give them a heads up. She quickly sat up and tore her lip away from his.

"What-" he began with a surprised look on his face.

She cut him off by bringing one of her legs up around his waist to straddle him and sat herself on his thighs with her arms around his neck. She gave him another smirk and leaned in to resume. She was ahead by one. He wasn't planning on losing. He slid both hands under her shirt to touch the skin of her back. She let out a drunken giggle, the same one he heard when they were drinking back on the ship.

"Shepard?" a voice behind her said.

They ignored it and continued making out like a couple of recruits.

"Shepard?" the voice said louder this time.

She ignored it but Zaeed tore his lips away and leaned over her shoulder as she took a chance to start kissing his jaw line.

"Get lost." Zaeed barked out and eyed Kaidan down for a few moments and returned to assault her mouth.

"Shepard." He said again, this time with more force.

"Can't you see we're busy kid?" Zaeed said as he pulled her closer to him, closing the gap between them. She giggled again and tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled his face back to hers.

He kept his eyes opened and looking right at Kaidan's shocked face as he slid his hands down to cup her ass. When she moaned into his mouth he smirked against her lips and winked at Kaidan.

"Shepard, we need to talk. You're drunk and-" he said as he stepped forward.

"And you're ruining a good time. You heard the man, get lost." She said as she looked back at him with her swollen lips and a smirk.

"I'm not one for an audience, come on love, we can finish this back on the ship." Zaeed said as he made to get up and lifted her with him. He set her down once they were out of the booth and kept an arm around her.

"Later, Kid." He said as he patted him on the shoulder and led her towards the door with his arm on her shoulder. She smirked at him as she put her arm around his waist.

On the way out they paused by Garrus. "Her armor is behind the blue plant. Meet you at the ship." He said so only Garrus could hear. Neither of them noticed the pissed look or the growling noise that was coming from the Turian as they walked out of the club.


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for the long wait. Long week at school. I'm horrible I know. But I stayed up till 7 am finishing this. Thanks for the reviews!

So, I think Shepard has a problem with drinking. Just sayin'. Turian lovers should rejoice in this chap.

* * *

They made their way out of Dark Star and turned down an alley a ways away to make sure that they weren't being followed. He kept his free hand on this gun and kept glancing around. You were never safe in any alley, whether it be omega or the space capital itself. His other arm was still around her for show. But her giggling and staggering steps gave him another reason to keep her close.

"Do we have to walk so fast?" she asked as she squeezed his side.

"We gotta get you back to the ship before that dipshit tries to make another move on you."

"He must be a damn fool to mess with you." She giggled and swayed to far forward. He held her closer to his side and led her forward.

"Goddamn Shepard, you really need to learn how to hold your alcohol."

"It's Shepard now? What happened to love?" at least she wasn't slurring her words yet.

"Didn't know we were still acting, love." He emphasized on the last word. This kind of talk was normal for them even if they didn't just dry hump in front of half of the citadel, ex-boyfriend and her favorite Turian.

"I didn't think you were one for pet names, at least to humans. I see how you look at Jesse. Should I be jealous?" she was putting most of her weight on him at this point. He barked out a deep loud laugh and almost dropped her.

"Are you kiddin' me? You'll always be my bottom bitch, love. No matter how hard you try." It was her turn to laugh.

They heard a noise behind them and someone calling her name. "Shit. Shit. Shit." She chanted as she hid her face in his shoulder. He pulled her and led her down a different alley way. He pushed her towards a dark doorway of a local store and she stumbled but kept herself leaning against the door next to it. He tried getting the door to open.

"Fuck. I was never good at this hacking bullshit." He cursed.

"Lemme try." Her words were slurring now.

"Oh, no. You're sloshed. You'll set the bloody alarm off. We gotta keep-" they heard footsteps again, a little louder this time.

He threw himself at her and crashed his lips to hers in attempt to keep the façade up. She moaned and tangled her fingers in his hair again. He put one hand under her muscle shirt to feel the skin of her waist. The other hand was cupping her ass to bring her closer to him. Right now he was one point up on their game from the bar.

She brought her knee up to rub against the thin plating of this groin and inner thighs. It caused him to hiss and pull away to look at her smirking face in full. Her face was flustered and her red eyes were looking right into is. He had been around a long time and had experience with women. He knew what that face was, it was the face of trouble. The kind of trouble he could never keep himself out of even if he tried. Truth be told, he never tried very hard.

She pulled his face down to hers by roughly grabbing the front of his armor. He was stunned at this point, she almost had checkmate. She brought her lips close to his ear and giggled softly and said "More." That was all he needed, gloves were off and it was no holds bar in this game.

He side stepped her knee that was against his groin and lifted her up by her waist. She instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck. He still had her up against the wall and was now attacking her neck and grinding against her. She moaned again this time in his ear. He was breathing harder and one of his hands was making it's way up her shirt again. Until he felt her grab his gun from his holster and charge it up. He spun his head around quickly to see a figure step around the corner they were hiding behind.

"Garbus? I thought you werr going to the Nomady?" she slurred as she lowered the gun and uncharged it.

"I thought the same about you. I thought the acting was over? For spirits sake Shepard! You're drunk, half naked and playing with guns and a merc! It's time to go now." He scolded and stepped forward to grab the gun. Zaeed took it from her first and holstered it. She was still in his arms with her legs around him.

"We were on our way to the ship, but we heard someone calling her name and we thought it was the kid again. I told you I was gonna take her back. How did you follow us through the alley?" Zaeed said with an annoyed tone obviously trying to get rid of Garrus.

"Turian's have a keen sense of smell and hearing. I think the show is over now, let her go." Garrus said with force as he stepped forward and held his arms out.

"I can handle this Blue, we were doin' just fine. I promise I'll get her back to the ship safely. Scout's honor."

"Shepard. It's time for bed." He gave her his stern look and opened her arms to him. It was clear to everyone that she was NOT walking anywhere by herself.

"But Garbus-" "Now." Zaeed passed her to the tall grumpy Turian.

"WE"LL meet YOU back at the ship." Garrus said as he turned and carried her bridal style towards the docking bay. She had her arms hung lazily around his neck under his fringe and her face buried against his jaw right under his mandible.

"That cock blocking rat bastard." Zaeed said as he adjusted his groin plate to ease the pressure.

* * *

"Hey, your skin-scaly things feel nice. Like the leather on my couch but smoother." She giggled and idly rubbed her finger tips across the plating on the back of his neck. He purred to her touch but kept the stern look on his face.

"We need to get you into the shower. You smell like him."

"But you said sleep." "Do not argue with me right now, Shepard." She stayed quiet the rest of the way back to the ship. She knew that tone and that face. She was in trouble and she was going to get scolded again when she was sober. She was the Commander of the ship and the missions, but he was the voice of reason in their friendship and her common sense or lack thereof.

When they got back to the ship he took the lift straight up to her quarters and walked right through her room and into her bathroom. He wasn't kidding, she was going to take a shower in her drunken state.

"Do you like the water hot or cold?" he asked as he stood her up but kept an arm around her since she started swaying again.

"Warm." She murmured and she leaned against him half asleep.

"What is warm? Ok, I'm going to put it on cold then move it to warm. You tell me when it's a good temperature for you." He said as he turned on the water. She squealed and threw herself at him to get away from the freezing water.

"I'm sorry! Ok, it's getting hotter now." He said as he held her closer to the water. She relaxed as he started "scrubbing" her down with his hands. He had no idea what he was doing but he had to get the merc's scent off of her or he would go insane.

She softly pushed him back and started taking off her shirt. "You can't take a shower with clothes on silly." She laughed and continued to undress.

He awkwardly looked away and was about to head out the door until he felt her tug at his armor.

"I know that Turian's have to take off that armor at some point, if I stink, you stink." She giggled and started unclasping his suit.

"Shepard, you're drunk. Just shower and get to bed, I'll be on the other side of the door if you need me." He tried swatting her hands away but she was being stubborn. He sighed and started removing his own armor.

Soon they were both naked and standing in the water together. She was leaning against him with her cheek pressed against his chest as she let him get rid of her "stink." He had to hold back the primal urges while showering with her. His plates were straining to open and her rubbing under his fringe was definitely not helping. Most of his curiosities of human female anatomy had been answered. But this experience just created more questions.

"Are you ready to get out? You smell like you again." She nodded her head and waited for him to wrap the towel around her she was so relaxed she was falling asleep again.

When he finally got her into bed wrapped in the towel she was already passed out. He tucked her in and turned around to leave but she grabbed his hand.

"Don't leave."

"Shepard-" he was cut off by EDI announcing Zaeed's arrival to the Normandy. He growled and thought about it. He didn't want the merc anywhere near her and he would most likely try and make his way up to her.

"Of course, let me turn off the light." He said without telling her of his real intentions. He always told her he was a bad Turian. He went to the door and changed the entrance code. He wanted to make damn sure that merc wasn't getting in. When he finished he made his way back to her. He fell asleep with a content mind and a victorious smirk.


	7. Chapter 7

Alright, it's been a very long time. I apologize. I've been busy with finals, working on my car and house sitting. So, none of those three things have gone well so far. BUT-here's a new chapter. It took a long time to write out. Things seem to make sense in my head but are hard to write out. Anyway, thanks again to everyone who reviewed, followed and read up till now! Special thanks to Carleen. My friend (IRL) Raven found this fic. *face palm*She's doing an awesome piece of artwork for me to put up on here for you guys to check out. Fic related of course. So…..when she reads this…..Raven, you're lucky I owe you a pinky toe. Nuff said.

* * *

After Zaeed was left out in the alley by himself he decided to take the long way back to avoid another awkward situation. He contemplated going to see Shepard when the Turian had left her alone and free in her room. NO. He had been in this game a long time. He did not chase women. They chased him. Always have, always will. It left no room for rejection. Lord knows he never took no very well anyway.

When he got back to the ship he made his way to the lift. He entered he looked at the button to go to her cabin but he pressed his 4th floor button instead. He grumbled to himself all the way down and cursing the Turian who put him in a shitty mood. "Just gonna let it go then." He grumbled as he walked into his room and went straight for the bottle he left by his usual hangout spot.

He poured himself a shot and slammed it down. "Don't give me that look Jessie. I'm not in the mood to talk about it." He said to his precious gun as he poured himself another round.

"Nothing happened. Don't even start. It meant nothing." He growled as he avoided looking at Jessie.

There was obviously a deep connection between the man and his beloved rifle that no one could see. In truth Jessie was nothing more than a rifle, but to him she was a hell of a lot more. At least she was, or used to be. Depends on which one of them you asked. Zaeed hadn't always been THAT harsh of a bastard that many know him to be. He had somewhat of a normal life, a beautiful dame, the closest friends and a name for himself.

He could remember every detail of her. The sweetest thing he'd ever laid his eyes one. She caught his attention back at a local bar back on earth. He was out drinking with his friends to celebrate a good raid of a local weapons shipment. She was a waitress serving drinks to the customers. She wasn't even serving his table. But he had his eye on her since he had sat down. She wore a white button up blouse that was a few buttons short up top and a black mini skirt that swayed when she walked. Legs for miles, is what he always told her. She had her brown hair up in a twist that was held with a clip. She was serving drinks to a group of drunken locals that apparently wanted to see more of her legs just like Zaeed did.

Vido was talking Zaeed's ear off about future plans for the gang but he didn't have his attention. When Zaeed saw one of the drunks try and sneak a hand up her skirt he lost it. She could obviously take care of herself though, because by the time he had stood up the drunk had been knocked out cold. She stood over him with her fist still clenched. His friends didn't seem to like it as much though. By the time they reacted and made a move towards her Zaeed was there ready to throw a fist or two of his own. When they had been beaten, bruised he let his friends take care of throwing them out. He took the opportunity to turn to her.

"You alright, love?" he asked as he held out a hand to help her out of the booth she jumped into to avoid the commotion.

"Yes, I could have easily taken care of myself though." She said with a matter of fact tone.

"I can see that, I'm sorry I got in your way then. Zaeed, at your service." He said as he bent down and kissed her hand.

"Wow, I would think you were an actual gentleman if you hadn't just destroyed two of my tables. I'm Jessie." She said with a sly smile.

"Sorry 'bout that. Listen, that time do you get off? I can stick around and maybe walk you home. Just to make sure they don't bother you."

"I get off in another hour. You can hang out here till I'm off or come back and meet me at the front door." She said as she walked away swaying her hips.

They had been inseparable ever since that night. She was his and he was hers. He made damn sure it stayed that way. He took over everything, and made sure she would never have to deal with frisky customers again. He got her to quit at the bar but couldn't keep her from working. She found a job as a waitress at some diner instead. It didn't pay as much but it made Zaeed feel better about her safety. He got them a place on the bad side of town for the time being.

"This is just temporary I promise you. Once the gang picks up, I'll give you a map of the galaxy and all you'll have to do is point your pretty little finger." He said that every time he came home from "work".

"Z, I told you before and I'll say it again, I'd live in a crate under the bridge with you. Don't worry about me. As long as you come home to me that's all I care about." She said as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"You're too good for me Jessie. Oi, I got you a gift. Walked passed it and it reminded me of you." He said as he let her go and went to his jacket that he left hanging by the door.

"Oh Z, a gun? Really? You know how I feel about guns." she said as she took it from him but kept a smile on her face.

"I just want you to keep it in your purse ok? It'd make me feel better. There are a lot of bad people out there that will do anything to get a few credits ahead in life."

"Well, I got you something too. Seeing as it's been 4 years that we've been together. You forgot didn't you?" she smiled as she walked into the bedroom to get something.

"Of course not, I got you something didn't I?" he said but his face said otherwise.

"Uh-huh. Well, open it up." She said as she shoved a box into his chest playfully.

He opened the box up and pulled out an M-8 Avenger assault rifle.

"Where did you get this? I didn't think they were even releasing this till fall." He said as he looked through the sights and inspected it.

"Don't worry about it." She said as she went into the kitchen to start on dinner.

"Let me guess, don't ask how much either? Jessie, you spoil me." He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her as he buried his nose in her hair.

Someone had knocked on the door loudly. "I bet you 100 creds it's your best friend." She said over her shoulder.

"It's not always him. We get other visitors too. Your friend Angie came over that one time." He said as he was walking to the door.

"Hey Zaeed, you ready to go?" Vido said when Zaeed opened the door.

"HA! 100 credits!" she yelled from the kitchen.

"Goddamn it." He said as he turned and walked back into the kitchen. "I never said yes."

"You never said no either."

"What are you guys going on about?" Vido said as he pushed the door closed.

"Don't worry about it. And stop slamming my door!" she yelled at him.

"Yeah, yeah. Hey, so are you ready to go?" Vido said as he leaned against the counter.

"I told you I'm not going. Batarians? Vido, they ain't mercs. Their slavers. First chance they get, they'll double cross us. Why do you think they work so goddamn cheap?" Zaeed said as he leaned on the opposite counter.

"Just hear them out! We'll be gone for no more than an hour!" Vido tried to convince him.

Zaeed just looked at Jessie for her advice. "God, just go! Dinner won't be ready for a while. You know he won't leave you alone anyway. But if you come back late for dinner, you're going to bed hungry. You got that?" She said as she pointed a finger at him.

"Got it. Be back soon." He said as he gave her a quick peck on the forehead and followed Vido out the door.

Zaeed had killed 3 bottles during his trip down memory lane. He was waxing goddamn nostalgia and it hurt. The alcohol seemed to dull the pain. At least that's what he liked to tell himself. He had been leaning against his usual wall in the cargo port drinking away the emotions. But the farther down this memory he went the farther away from stability he was. He slowly slid down the wall to sit with his back leaning against it and his legs were straight out in front of him. He had the thousand yard stare as he continued his nostalgia.

"NOOOOOOO! JESSIE!" He yelled as he ran up the stairs to their apartment. He could see the broken glass that had smoke coming out of them and the glow of flames coming from his apartment when he returned.

His eyes burned from the smoke and it was getting hard to breathe. He kept going, pushing himself; he had to get to Jessie. He was pushing as hard as he could against a crowd of other tenants trying to evacuate the building. That's when he heard it. Gun shots. He pushed people, women, children, elderly, everyone. He had to get to Jessie. No one else in that moment mattered to him.

When he got to his floor he pulled out the rifle Jessie had given him not more than an hour before all this shit happened. He made his way down the hall in a tactical style. Guard up, eyes open, clearing all open doors and hallways. Movement on the right. He spun towards it and caught a Batarian in the chest before he got him.

"SONSUHBITCHES!" he yelled as he quickened his pace.

When he got to his door he kicked it down and looked wildly around for her. He was met with a group of Batarians who had her pinned down to the ground on her knees. A few of their guys had been taken out, their bodies were scattered throughout the apartment. One by the couch, another near the kitchen and a boot was poking out from the hallway to their bedroom.

"Z! Help me! Please!" she screamed as one of them put the barrel of his rifle to the back of her head and pulled her head by her hair to shut her up.

"Shut up bitch!"

"It's gonna be ok Jess, I'm gonna get you out of here." He told her as he kept his gun up and stood defiantly in the doorway.

"So this is the guy the boss was talking about." One said as he kept his gun pointed back at Zaeed.

"What do you want?! Who's your boss?" he demanded.

"Don't you worry about it. He'll be here soon enough." One of them laughed.

Right before Zaeed was about to make a move to shoot one of them he was hit on the back of the head with the butt of a rifle. He went down hard and was quickly removed of his weapon and was being held down on his knees by two people.

"Well, well. Hello again Zaeed. Long time no see." A voice said behind him.

"Vido?! What in the bloody fuck do you think you're doin?!" Zaeed ripped his arm away from one of the people holding him down and started swinging. He was quickly restrained again but by more men. Six of them, his men, or at least they used to be. His gang, his men-his friends. All of them were but the Batarians who were still holding Jessie down.

"Make sure he can't use those again" Vido said as he stepped into the room and stood in front of Zaeed between him and Jessie. Flames were moving from the kitchen to the living room furniture and window curtains. No one seemed to be paying any attention to it's progress though.

His second in command came up to Zaeed with a knife. Jessie screamed. He felt a sharp pain in his arm and felt blood trickle down. The tendon in his arm right above his elbow had been sliced. An imperfect incision identical to that one had been done to his other arm as well. He was still being held down to his knees but he wasn't fighting back as hard anymore.

"Leave him alone! Fucker! You leave him the fuck alone!" she screamed at Vido as she was being held down herself.

"What do you want Vido?" Zaeed said looking right at him with pure rage in his eyes.

"I want something you never could understand, Zaeed. Growth of the business. The Blue Suns are being held back by you. We cannot gain any profit, reputation or business when you don't want to open your eyes and the gang up to bigger better partners! You are too stubborn to see that. I tried for years to make you understand. To bring you with me to glory. But you didn't want to see it my way; you were being too blinded by this chit." Vido said as he paced in front of him.

"I'll do whatever you want. Let her go. Take the gang, the money, everything! Just let her go!" he tried bargaining.

"You see it's too late for that. It was you that taught me to end contracts permanently. Never leave a loose end. Isn't that right, Zaeed?" he said with a smirk.

"I swear to god, if you harm her-" "You'll what?! Kill me?! You're really not in the position to do much of anything, friend." Vido spat.

"Z, make him stop." Jessie cried.

"I'm sorry, Love. I never wanted any of this. I swear I never meant to get you hurt." Zaeed said as he watched his lover cry, helpless to do anything. Vido nodded to the Batarian who was gripping her hair. He pulled out a knife and held it to her throat.

"I don't' blame you for anything. It's not your fault. I love you Z. I want you to keep doing what you do best, ok? I want you to fight. For me. Never stop fighting." She said while looking into his eyes.

"Jessie, look at me. Love, look at me. Please. DON'T! JESSIE!" Zaeed screamed as the Batarian slid his blade across her throat in a sickening U shape. He eyes went wide and her mouth kept opening and closing like a fish out of water desperate for oxygen to hit her lungs. Her body was rigid for what seemed like eternity until finally he saw the light leave her eyes and her struggling stopped.

"NOOOOOOOO! JESSIE! GODDAMN IT! JESSIE!" he screamed and tried to get to her but six of his old crew were still holding him down.

"How sentimental….it never had to go this far Zaeed, if only you listened to me. I think I'll do the honors myself with you." Vido said as he picked up the gun that Zaeed had given Jessie earlier.

Zaeed had hit pure rage. He managed to half push back the men holding him and slip out from the massive amount of blood he lost and charge at Vido. Who had already had the pistol pointing at him. One gunshot. One bullet. Pink mist. He went down. Everything cut out. No light, no sound, no Jessie.

Zaeed was now a total of 6 bottles into his memories. Far beyond piss drunk. He couldn't even raise the bottle to drink anymore. He sat there in a comatose state just staring up at the table the rifle was laying on.

"Jessie…" he said as his eyes slowly shut and everything went black around him. He passed out on the floor on his room surrounded by empty bottles of whiskey and rum.


	8. Chapter 8

I am sooooo effin' sorry. I finished my Ford program, I graduate on the 7th and I've been getting jobs lined up. Right now I work for Ford but I will probably be moving to North Dakota or Texas. Since Australia costs too much to just up and move to. *shakes fist*

I want to take the time to thank everyone for the reviews and all the new followers I have. Keep 'em coming! I hope everyone is having a good read. Once again, check out Carleen's work!

Oh! Almost forgot! My good friend Raven is drawing me something special! My Pairing! When it's done I'll be posting it as the profile pic for this story. It's gonna be awesome. And you can all check out her work on deviant art.

REVIEW!

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"Commander Shepard, Dr. Chakwas would like to see you in the medbay." EDI's voice said over the comm speakers.

Shepard didn't even stir. She was out and no one was going to wake her. Garrus wanted to make sure it stayed that way. He pulled back the covers and rolled out of her bed.

"I'll take care of it EDI, Commander Shepard is taking a sick day. No one is to bother her unless she tells you otherwise." Garrus replied while putting his armor back on.

Yes, he had just rolled out of his commander's bed naked and she was still tucked in naked as well. Nothing happened of course. He was far too much or a gentleman and would never take advantage of her. As bad as he wanted to, he also didn't know how.

He was so lost in the human code of conduct that he felt like an idiot in front of her. He always got lost in their emotions and facial expressions. Why couldn't they just have noises that they made like Turians? Or verbally state their emotions like the Elcor? It was all too confusing.

One thing he remembered back from his C-Sec days was a commanding officer of his giving him a few pointers on were out on a break one day watching people. "Don't show your teeth, humans may show their's all the time when smiling but the Turian pointed teeth scared them. That's why Vorcha don't deal with humans directly. Human's don't have teeth to do harm. Only for eating apparently. Not much use, I say. Humans also react to touching, See that?" he said as he nodded in the direction of two males greeting each other at a lunch table. They shook hands and one rested his hand on the other's shoulder. After a brief moment they let go of each other and sat down.

"They touch each other as a familiarity. Like a social greeting. You know how Krogan head butt each other? It's like that. Pointless but it's a social standard. Shake hands and touch the shoulder. It's like a comfort thing to them. They hold hands with each other and hug for familiarity and show of trust. Don't freak out when you shake their hand though. Just a warning they have too many fingers. They are an easily offended species. Dont know how they made it this far if you ask me." he said as he finished his lunch and tossed the wrapper at a nearby trash can. He missed but a near-by keeper picked it up for him.

Those words of advice, wisdom, whatever they were had stuck with him through out his C-Sec days and afterwards. They seemed to work out for him so far. Except for when it came to Shepard. It was like everything fell apart when it came to Shepard. The words that came out of his mouth fumbled and his actions were far from romantic.

He made sure to tuck her in further before he left the room. He never knew how they survived so long. Certain temps, food, environments, it was all too complicated for him. He bent down and inhaled her scent deeply and turned and walked out of the room.

"Garrus! What a pleasant surprise, what brings you down here?" Dr. Chakwas said as she turned in her chair.

"Shepard got a call from EDI saying you needed her. I hope I can help instead. She is ah...taking a sick day." he said as he moved closer to her desk.

"She drank too much again didn't she? Don't even tell me. I can't judge when I'm a bad example myself."she threw her hands up and turned back to her desk.

"I took care of her, she's still asleep upstairs. I'll be keeping an eye on her. I hope she doesn't do that squeaking thing like you did. I don't think I know what to do when that happens. I might call for you."

"Garrus, those are hiccups. They are harmless, humans just ride them out. There are some odd ways to get rid of them though. Like scaring the person who has them, making them drink water upside down, have them concentrate on something else. Doesn't always work though. So they just suffer through them, no, they don't hurt." she explained.

"...I'll just call you..." She roller her eyes at him.

"So since you're here in the Commander's place, I was going to give this to her for you, but I think maybe its best if you give it to her personally. It does have her name on it. I found it under one of the operating tables and it must have fallen out when I was patching you up." Dr. Chakwas held out a small chip the size of a quarter.

His eyes got wide and his mandibles were held tightly against his jaw. He had forgotten about that chip, well he didn't forget. He figured that when he was shot in the face with the rocket that it had been eradicated. It was in his visor, an external memory chip of a recording.

"I didn't think that would have survived the blast from the gunship. Thankyou, I will take it back." He grabbed the chip from her extended hand and avoided her gaze. He knew that she had gone through the chip, hell he would have too.

"You should give it to her. She needs to know Garrus." She said as she put her other hand over his that was taking the chip.

He looked at her with a sad face. "It's not easy. It never is easy with her, if I was human like Massani, I might have a shot. Being a Turian, so out-of-place. She doesnt even see me."

"She's stubborn Garrus. Remember when Kaidan chased her around the first Normandy like a lost puppy for months until he finally cornered her in the lift? She's been a soldier like you all her life. Always focused on the mission. Unlike Turians, we don't relieve stress aboard military vessels. Well we do, but it's not a well-known thing." She laughed at her own statement.

"I don't want to relieve stress with her-well, I do but-how? I mean..." he dropped his hands and sighed deeply. "I just want to be close to her all the time. I want to be near her scent, to always protect her. I don't know how else to exlain this in human terms. I want to touch her shoulder?"

"Her shoulder? I don't think you have that right. My boy, it sounds to me like you love her. That's the human word for it." She smiled up at his lost face.

"Thank you Doctor. I'll think about giving her the chip. I need to think about some things. Don't worry, I'll take care of her today and make sure her duties are taken care of." He nodded his head to her, turned and walked out of the medbay with a heavy mind.

He made his way to the elevator and pushed the button and waited for what seemed like eternity for the doors to open. He held the chip in his hands and just stared at it thinking of what to do. He could watch the recording but he already knew exactly what was on it. He had made the recording with the belief that he wasn't going to make it back on Omega. He had plans to have the chip delivered to her grave, memorial or whatever it was that was made for her. All the details were left in the recording. But now that he had it back and neither of them were currently deceased...it changed everything.

The doors opened and he made a move to walk in but was stopped by a figure leaving it.

"Hey Blue, tell Shepard I've cleaned her armor for her." Zaeed said as he passed the sad-looking Turian.

Just what he needed, a run in with the unknown variable in the equation. He just grunted something incoherent and got into the elevator to get back to Shepard. If that merc weren't on the ship things would be so much easier. Competition, Garrus didn't like it. In the Turian culture, when two males are trying to win the hand of a female it didn't end very well. Never did. His instincts were kicking in and it was becoming harder not to act on them.

When he got back to her cabin he found her still in bed but in a different position. Lying on her belly with the sheets barely covering her rear end. A low growling noise came out of his throat as he watched her and took in her scent that was all over her room.

He looked around her room and realized it was a mess. It was usual for her to have a messy work space, living area, bathroom...it bothered the hell out of him. If he was going to stay in here and watch after her he might as well do something. He was a bit of a neat freak as the humans and asari called it. Things had a place and they belonged in that place. Her cabin would never pass the Turian military inspection and regs.

He began picking up her clothes that were scattered around the room. He noticed that a few of her shirts smelled wrong, off and offensive. Smoke, alcohol and pheromones. It was that damn merc. His smell was all over her clothes just like they had been last night.

That was the final straw for him. He was going to give her the chip and be a real Turian. Stand up for what he wanted and give it all he had. No more hints, awkwardness and social misunderstandings. He was going to lay it down for her and she could either take it or leave it. The leaving it part scared the shit out of him. He felt so strongly for her that he didn't know if he could take rejection. The friendship would probably die, he would have to leave the Normandy and never see her again. Where would he go? Omega seemed like it was just waiting for him to go back so it could finish the job. That seemed like a good plan b.

He walked past her coffee table to put her clothes in the wash hamper that was in the bathroom but knocked his shin against it and a few data pads fell off the tabel. He cursed at himself and stayed completely still hoping that she wouldn't wake up.

"Garrus? What are you doing?"

He panicked and tossed her clothes on the couch but a pair of her frilly underwear had attached itself to his talon. So much to manning up.

"I-uh-was cleaning-stuck on my hand-didn't mean to wake you." He was rambling like she did when she got caught.

"It's ok. You don't have to clean." She laughed at his current position. If Turian's could blush...

"How are you feeling? Do you need me to get you anything?" The offensive underwear was finally detached from him and he made his way to sit next to her.

"I'm kind of thirsty and my head is killing me. How long have I been out? What the fuck happened?" she sat up to talk to him and the bed sheet fell into her lap revealing her chest and tattoos. He stared of course.

"Oh shit. I'm sorry." She laughed as she picked up the sheets again and brought them up to her chin.

He pulled her arm out from under her sheet and inspected her arm. "Your colony marks are so intricate. I don't remember you having them on the first Normandy. Did Cerberus put them on you?"

She laughed again. "I've always had them Garrus, I just always wore long sleeves or my under armor all the time. It's frowned upon in our military. It's not like your Turian military where we can openly wear our markings, well, we call them tattoos. When Cerberus rebuilt me, a lot of them were faded and all fucked up or missing. So I had to get them re-done my third trip back to Omega."

"Speaking of Omega...Shepard, there's something I want to show you. No, I need to show this to you. I made this after you had died. We were all in a bad place, the whole crew, you know that. Some say I was worse off than others. Not going to say I disagree with them. But, this means a lot to me. I fear if I don't give this to you, you'll just disappear from my life again and I will have missed my chance. Ah...now I'm the one who's rambling. I'm going to leave this here. When you're ready, if you want to, take a look. The whole ship knows you're taking a sick day and I'm covering your duties. I want you to take it easy and if you need anything, comm me up. I'll be running your shift." He leaned in and touched his mandibles to her forehead and inhaled her scent.

Before he left he placed the chip on her desk as promised and walked out of her cabin.

* * *

OOOOOOOOOOO what did he leave her?! dun dun dun


	9. Chapter 9

I want to start by apologizing like an over dramatic teenager. I AM SO SORRY I NEGLECTED YOU AND I WILL PROMISE THAT I WILL TRY MY HARDEST TO NEVER DO THAT AGAIN. Then the explanation... I graduated. Looked for a job. Went to Hawaii. Things have been a cluster-fuck. Next week I am going to Texas to accept a job offer. Ugh. I'm so sorry. *real tears*

Gonna get this shit goin'.

* * *

*static* -BOOM- *static* -CRASH-

"Damn it. This thing on?" She heard Garrus' voice but saw no picture.

His helmet appeared on the video from his omi-tool point of view. It was the apartment she found him on back on the hell called Omega.

"There we go. Look, whoever finds this chip when I'm dead and gone with the Spirits, I want it to be placed on Commander Shepard's memorial, grave, tomb-whatever the alliance has done for her. Seeing as I didn't really stay for the funeral, I'm not sure what where she is now." He said and took a chance to peek over the railing to his right.

Gunfire could be heard through the video. When it was close enough to his position, it made the static white noise. Made her realize how many close calls they've all had, ducking behind minimal cover, limited ammo, cornered. Yet he was there all alone. Team was dead and gone. Ratted out by his second in command.

"I don't know how long I have, what all I can fit before a stray catches me. But-HOLD ON-" He popped up to the railing and fired off 3 rounds while she could still see him. Up the barrel of his gun. His pose, stillness despite the chaos around him. His mumble before he shoots, the one short breath and one deep held in.

"Look, Shepard-there were so many things I wanted to say. Things I should have said but wasn't man enough to tell you when other's were. I want-no I need to tell you before I join you up there." He turned his head to the left to avoid the dust and debris falling off the ceiling and railing he was hiding behind.

When he moved his omni-tool she could sometimes see the heat traces of bullets hitting the roof and walls around him. Sometimes a random frag would fly by. Whoever was in charge of that out on the bridge had a shitty toss and Garrus seemed to know that because he didn't flinch as he heard their high-pitched beeping charges go off around him.

"Shepard, no, I'll use your real name. Aino. Didn't think I knew it did you?" she could tell he was giving her that smirk under his helmet.

"Aino, I'm not great with words, humans, or with women for that matter. Here I am, a broken Turian fighting his last stand in the slums of Omega. Hmm. Funny isn't it? Omega, in your galaxy it means the end. Yet, here I am. Recording a mushy heart-felt video for a mate that never was. Could have been? Never know. But I've always looked up to you and never thought of you as more than a commander. Until I saw the real you. I hate to say it but I found out I cared for you when Ash died. The passion and pain I saw in you for the first time. It grew from that. The fire in your eyes as we hunted Saren across the galaxy. The way you made me feel when you were crammed in close to me when driving the mako. Although I think that was partially due to the motion sickness of your shitty driving." He let his head drift up a bit while getting caught in the memory. His fringe was sticking up past the railing.

His head knocked to the left quickly and the sound of a ricochet bullet could be heard. He quickly learned his lesson and cursed.

"Damn that was close. Alight, I'm stalling from my inevitable eradication. I am not the best with emotions or words or with you. But you're always on my mind, my dreams, I can't get you out of my head. So, I wrote you a poem. Very Turian of me, I know. I promise it's not as bad as Elcore or Hannar poetry but I tried. Spirits know, I have tried." He paused and popped back up to the railing.

He emptied his clip and each round fired, she watched his routine. The mumble, one short breath and one deep.

He ducked for cover again and leant against the short railing that was taking a large amount of gunfire from the other side.

After reloading his favorite rifle he looked directly into the omi-tool. She could see its orange glow reflecting in his helmet.

"A sound ahead from distant peaks,

A song that all my brothers sing.

It's just out of reach,

To join them I need the wings the heaven denied me.

It's like you're deaf to my voice,

But I've been here for every moment,

Waiting on your call to move.

If you could just make a choice,

I know you would find me wanting only to be close to you."

His head looked down and away for a moment and looked back up. "This is the part where you laugh and embarrass me."

He jumped back up and delivered a few more shots. She noticed that he paused for a few extra moments and switched to his concussive round briefly. Then continued to fire.

He ducked back down and shook his head.

"I think I'm going insane. That happens right? You see the happiest moments of your life before the Spirits take you away. Well, hoping for a simple ending, I hope you're not too mad when I get up there because I just shot your memory in the shoulder with a concussive round out on the bridge. If my mental state would have anyone end me, I would want it to be you. It was always you. I know you would "kick my scaly ass" if I didn't go down fighting. Let's see how many more Mercs I can take with me before you come through that door to take me away." With that the recording ended with the last image being him doing his usual unnecessary checking for a live round in the chamber. The round was always in the chamber.

She sat there in front of her desk holding the data pad she loaded the chip into. She paid no attention to the tears staining her cheeks. She relived losing him again. This time she knew everything. What led him there and that she was the cause of all of it. Lost. That's what he was without her. The only thing he was ever certain of was her. The only thing he ever believed in was her.

She sat there for the rest of her sick day and most of the night replaying the recording. Taking in all his words. Missing him even though he was only 2 decks below her, breathing and safe. She fell asleep on her bed holding the data pad to her chest.

* * *

Alright, there ya go. Poured his heart into that eh? What's she gonna do? What should she do?

The credit for Garrus' poem goes to a band called Oh Sleeper. The song is called Reveries of Flight. It's about a man having a conversation with a higher power but not getting the answers he needs. Doubting of faith I guess. Thought it was fitting for Garrus.

Aino is my Shep's name, it's one of my other nicknames my Finnish friends gave me. Was thinking of not using it and letting the readers fill in the blanks. Should I take it out?


	10. Chapter 10

So, the new fic pic is up that was done by my awesome friend Raven. PM me for her deviant art info!  
There are a hell of a lot more reviews that were given and I am grateful for all of them! I will take them into consideration. I ve been so busy again with the travelling and job searching. I apologize. I will promise that I will never give up on this fic! I just ask that you be patient with me. I am now living in Texas. I want to go home so bad.

So I take it there are a lot of Garbus lovers reading eh? Everyone is on the Turian s side hmmm? No love for old Zaeed? Well, wait till it plays out shall we?

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Shepard woke up early the next day with a mild headache. Not from the alcohol but from the crying and emotional overdose of everything that had happened the past few days. Garrus getting jealous of her and Zaeed getting close. Then him giving her the external chip that contained his last words to her. She could hear his voice and see his body giving up. It was too much for her to handle and too much for her to think about without getting all emotional again. She looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror.  
Puffy eyes and a red nose stared back at her.

Great she sighed as she turned and started the shower to get ready for her day.

While getting ready and suiting up her thoughts raced through her head. Why now? Why her? What should she do? Did she feel the same?

She certainly loved Garrus as a friend. She never thought of him as more than that. She never looked for sex, relationships, love or any sort of emotional attachment. She always ended up getting hurt and tossed aside. She never had time for them anyway. There was always too much to do, so many people to save and a galaxy to set straight. Sure, she got lonely, who didn't? But she always just toughed through it.

She always thought back to Anderson and Hackett. What would they do? Always put the mission before your own needs and wants. Alliance soldiers through and through. That s when she was still alive and enlisted. Now, she s on her own with no military back up or military crew. They were doing fine without the alliance guidance or funding. Weren t they?

Why was Garrus so harsh on Zaeed? They drank together. But she also drank with Kasumi, Chakwas and Joker on occasion. Oh, don t forget the weekly poker game with the engineers. They also joked together and told stories to each other but she did that with every crew member. There was the plan to get away from Kaidan. But it was merely an escape plan. It was clearly laid out that it was just a front.

Maybe the Turian knew something about the Merc that she didn t know. She really didn t want to know though. She was damn sure the merc wouldn t want her knowing either.

Should she let Garrus down? Should she give him a shot? The emotions and lack thereof were too much for her. She couldn t avoid him forever and a day. Well, she could but the Turian would surely hunt her down. She could always ask for time to think. Yes. Time to think. Then the it s not you it s me talk.

Perhaps she could take things slow and learn to love him as more than a friend. But the thought of any plan of action made her head hurt and want her to start drinking again this early in the morning.

She made her way to Crew level and hit the pot of coffee before sucking it up and heading to the Cannons where the Turian resided.

As fate would have it, he walked out as she stepped up to the emergency pod hallway. They both stopped and looked at each other with shyness and curiosity.

"Shepard, I hope you are doing better this morning." He said as he walked closer to her.

"I am. Thank you for taking care of me yesterday and the night before." She said as she met him halfway.

The awkwardness surrounding them was nearly choking her and it was hard to breathe. Was it hot in here or was she still hung-over?

"Not a problem at all. You know I would do anything for you Shepard." He said as he turned his head and seemed suddenly interested in the escape pod.

"Garrus, the chip you gave me, it was, well let s just say no one has made me cry like that before. No matter how cheesy your poem was." She smirked at him.

"You know, if you really want a poem that'll tear you up we could always catch a Hannar poetry jam next Citadel stop." He teased right back.

"Thanks, but I think I'll pass on that one." she threw her hand up in defeat and took a sip from her coffee.

"If poetry isn't your thing, the Hannar also have a comedy group that are doing a one night only re-enactment of "Who's on first" I'm sure would really put your earth version to shame." he said as hooked a hip back and crossed his arms.

That did it. *gag*snort*spit* She choked on her coffee and sprayed it all over the Turian's blue armor from his crossed arms down. Since he was the taller of the two his face and precious visor were safe.

"Really Shepard? I just cleaned my armor last night. As it is this armor has taken enough damage." he referenced to the side that took the rocked while he patted her back while she continued to cough. Little did she know, he was really trying to wipe as much of it on her sweater as he could.

"Goddamn it Garrus. *cough* It's your fault. *cough* Wrong tube." she forced out as she tried to breathe, talk and laugh at the same time.

"You alright? Should I get Mordin? I'm sure he would be thrilled to perform the Heimlich on a human or take the opportunity to shove something down your throat."

More choking laughter. She turned and started swatting at him with her free hand.

"Shut up. I can't breathe." she gasped.

Alright, alright. I m sorry, I just enjoy hearing you laugh and seeing you smile. We re in a war, people don t have the time to take a step back and catch their breath. I just want to make sure you stay grounded and don t get lost like I did. He said as he moved closer and gently rubbed a gloved talon down the right side of her face.

She stood there quietly looking up at him with her deer in the headlights look she got when she was cornered. He enjoyed it for a moment and backed off.

I know how you are, Shepard. You don t want to hurt my feelings but you aren t sure how you feel about everything. I know you too well, Aino. All too well. He started retreating back to the main battery.

Garrus wait- she said.

Can it wait for a bit? I m in the middle of some calibrations. He said with his smart ass smirk and closed the door behind him.

Fuck. I hate it when he s right. She said as she turned and headed back to the elevators.


End file.
